Thursday, May 16- During Period 2 US History, Brent Reinhardt asks, “Who understands the economy?” Sammy Kauffman (’14) replies, “Economists…?”
Wednesday, May 1- In Period 3 Algebra II, Josh Weaver tells Austin Hooley (’15), “Your curves are spectacular!”
Thursday, April 25- Michael Yeakey tells Period 7 English, “Nuns hit people on the hand with rulers and there were 35 people per class.” Ashley Brugh (’13) asks, “That’s allowed!?” Michael responds, “The rulers or the number of kids?” Ashley says, “I was talking about the number or kids, but let’s talk about the rulers!”
Tuesday, April 23- Discussing past boyfriends of Amber Heydon (’13), Period 7 English asks if Julian Phillips-Kanagy is a good kisser. Ryan Minter (’13) nods knowingly and responds, “Oh yes. He is.”
Friday, April 19- Josh Leatherman (’13) tells Period 1 Concert Choir, “I often read in the tub.”
Monday, April 8- Michael Yeakey asks Period 5 English if anybody’s heard of Lumosity. Josh Leatherman (’13) asks, “Is that the thing that helps you learn a language in like 5 days?” Michael responds, “No… That’s Rosetta Stone.”
Tuesday, March 19- During Orchestra class, Adam Krahn (’14) says, “Pretty much every person who looks different at Bethany is considered Asian.”
Friday, March 15- During Period 3 Spanish II, Corey Hostetler (’14) tells Bryan Nguyen (’14) that he wants to live in “Irelandia.” Bryan responds, “Irelandia no existe!”
Monday, February 18- While waiting for people to finish working in class, Himal King (’13) says, “I wish I had a beard to stroke.”
Friday, February 15- Michael Yeakey tells Ike Lehman (’13), “Sometimes I think you have been replaced by an alien- a bitter middle-aged alcoholic.” Ike replies, “You mean my dad?”
Friday, February 15- While discussing Finding Nemo and Dory’s whale sounds in Period 7 English 12, Michael Yeakey says, “There should be more lesbian fish movies.”
Thursday, February 14- Josh Leatherman (’13) claims, “My brother and father have this sixth sense. They can always tell which direction is left and right. Even in the dark.”
Wednesday, February 13- While looking at his classroom projector, Michael Yeakey asks the class, “Why does this say it’s on standby?” Himal King (’13) responds, “Because it’s on standby.”
Wednesday, February 13- Michael Yeakey asks Josh Helmuth (’13) where he gets most of his calories. Josh answers, “Food, mostly.”
Tuesday, February 12- In response to a Period 5 English discussion, Jesse Bontreger (’13) asks, “Was there any time when arrogance and slobbishness was attractive?” Himal King (’13) replies, “Vikings!”
Monday, February 11- In Period 5 Chemistry, Manuela Harder (’15) sees a poster from the Chem II class about cocaine. Alarmed, she asks, “We learn to make cocaine?!?”
Friday, February 8- During Period 8 Christian Faith Journey, Stacie Park (’13) asks Dale Shenk if he has lotion. Dale replies, “I’m a man. I don’t have lotion.”
Tuesday, February 5- “For a person like me, it wouldn’t be helpful. But for the average person, it probably would be.” –Adam Krahn (’14) in response to Dale Shenk‘s question in Period 4 Church History
Tuesday, February 5- Katie Hurst (’14) asks Michael Yeakey, “Can we get some more of those blue cords that plug into the computer and make internet?”
Tuesday, February 5- While reviewing a question about Al Capone for a test in Period 2 US History, Aaron Maust (’14) says, “I got this guys. I’m black.” Corey Hostetler (’14) replies, “Al Capone was white…”
Friday, February 1- “So, on Monday I’ll teach you how to make meth, but let’s just work on an explosive for today.” –Calvin Swartzendruber, to Period 8 Chem II
Wednesday, January 30- Tim Lehman tells Period 2 AP Government that he has “binders full of women.”
Tuesday, January 29- During mentoring with Elise Romero (’13) and Natalie Thorne (’13), Amber Heydon (’13) asks KP, “Who was the football player that bent his knee really gross? Â R2D2?” KP responds, “Do you mean RG3?” Elise and Natalie burst into laughter.
Tuesday, January 29- Michael Yeakey tells his Period 5 Senior English class, “Jean Ahn (’13) went to el baño.” Josh Leatherman (’13) asks, “Why is she at a restaurant?”
Monday, January 28- As Chemistry II class smells amines, Ryan Minter (’13) says, “This one smells familiar.” Himal King (’13) agrees, but cannot identify the smell. Two minutes later, Ryan screams, “Himal! It’s crotch sweat!”
Wednesday, January 23- During a Junior English period, the class talks about a man on the cover of a romance novel. Joseph Mumaw (’14) asks, “Why is he only wearing a sword? Where’s his shirt?” Michael Yeakey replies, “Come on, Joseph. You’re just jealous of his sword… if you know what I mean.”
Wednesday, January 23- During Period 5 English, Kevin Hawkins (’13) says, “I’m definitely a home boy. I get homesick really easily.”
Wednesday, December 19- Before school, Brooke Hershberger (’14) comments on the sight of Corey Hostetler‘s (’14) foot, exclaiming, “It looks like a sausage!” Sammy Kauffman (’14) replies, “What kind of sausage do you eat?”
Monday, December 17- Jim Buller tells his Period 1 Psych class, “Often when we think of evolution we think of scary changy stuff.”
Monday, December 17- During 7th Period, Stacie Park (’13) asks Dale Shenk, “Do you have something sweet?” Dale responds, “Just me!”
Monday, December 17- Michael Yeakey asks someone in his 9th Period AP Lit class to slap Adam Krahn (’14) for him. The rest of the class is astonished.
Thursday, December 13- Matthew Smucker (’16) claims, “Peter Shirk (’16) touched me down there!” Peter responds, “Because I was falling and I had to catch something!”
Wednesday, December 12- Jean Ahn (’13) and Sadie Gustafson-Zook (’13) sing “The Start of Something New” from High School Musical during Period 3 Study Hall. Abe Thorne (’14) asks, “Is that Frank Ocean?”
Tuesday, December 11- Michael Yeakey says, “Yo, homies! Da roundball team be lightin’ up da court like it wuz a fatty, Caleb Morris (’13) be pimpin’ and all.”
Thursday, December 6- “When I was in high school, people could bring guns to school,” says Tim Lehman. Joe Kreider (’13) replies, “I knew people who brought guns to school!”
Thursday, December 6- Tim Lehman tells AP Government students, “You can’t go around calling Caleb Morris (’13) a slut. That’s sexual harassment.”
Wednesday, December 5- “Ben Hochstetler (’12) has Judaism as his religion on Facebook,” says Isaac Schertz (’13). “It probably changes his side ads,” replies Michael Yeakey, going into an accent and proclaiming, “Visit the holy land! Live in a kibbutz!”
Tuesday, December 4- While discussing Song of Songs, Michael Yeakey tells Period 5 English, “Jesus wouldn’t talk about the church’s breasts.”
Monday, December 3- Jean Ahn (’13) imitates Natalie Thorne (’13), saying, “I’m not stubborn, I’m just right all the time.”
Friday, November 23- Barb Slagel asks Period 9 Economics, “What do your parents have in their house that my parents wouldn’t have had?” Josh Stoltzfus (’13) replies, “Black people.”
Tuesday, November 20- While referencing the most popular democratic presidents, Tim Lehman tells his senior AP Government class that “JFK didn’t last long enough to count.”
Monday, November 19- Nathan Swartzendruber tells the concert choir to mark a measure of their music with “a star, a circle, a rabid bunny with fangs… really whatever you want.”
Wednesday, November 14-Â Joe Kreider (’13) refers the seniors walking to Economics Period 9 as the “march of the damned.”
Tuesday, November 13-Â Hans Miller (’15) says “You know the stupider you are, the lighter your hair is.” Liz DeLeeuw (’14) replies “But my hair can’t get lighter!”
Monday, November 5- Michael Yeakey tells his Period 7 senior English class, “You have to be on dope to major in music at Goshen College.” Joe Kreider (’13) responds, “Especially if you’re a bass player. Waddup!”
Tuesday, October 30- As Period 5 English 12 discusses the novel The Devil in the White City, the look over a passage that talks about several cases of “foreign bodies in the eyes.” Amber Heydon (’13) is dumbfounded and cannot figure out how foreign bodies got into people’s eyes.
Monday, October 29- “I’m the most sarcastic teacher in the school,” says Dale Shenk sarcastically during one of his Bible classes.
Thursday, October 18-Â Michael Yeakey tells Period 5 senior English class, “I’m a love machine.”
Wednesday, October 10- During lunch, Kevin Hawkins (’13) tells Maddie Gerig (’13), “If you ever want to feel better about yourself, just go to Walmart…(long pause)… They have great motivational cards.”
Friday, September 21- During a 7th period Senior English class, students ask Michael Yeakey what the definition of his screensaver word of the day, invagination, is. Yeakey replies, “I do not know that word. But I can guess what it means.”