“What do you call the person who gives birth to babies?” -Darienne Maust (‘16)
During a fierce discussion in AP Government about birds on future currency, Gi Salas (‘16) says “How about we use guinea pigs?” David Kauffman (‘16) loudly exclaims,”Are guinea pigs birds!? NO. THEY’RE PIGS!”
Jiwoo Wi (‘17) ask Mason Tollar (‘16) “Do you shave your armpits? Because if you do, good for you!” David Kauffman (‘16) interrupts jokingly. “No Mason waxes.”
“Do I smell like old people? Cause I watch them for money?” -Darienne Maust
In 3rd period study hall Alex Reinhardt (‘16) tells Isabel Rondo (‘16) “your calculator is dying..oh it’s dead..rest in peace sweet prince.”
In 4th period English, Jiwoo Wi (’17) and Michael Yeakey are discussing Iago from Shakespeare’s Othello:
Jiwoo: “Why is he so mean?”
Michael: “Well, he’s Iago.”
Jiwoo: “He’s a tool.”
Michael: “I think Iago might be an old Venetian term for tool…”
Jiwoo: “Really!”
Michael: “No, not really.”
During Mediation Assessment Darienne Maust (‘16) and Noah Richer (‘16) were discussing a water bottle incident. When Noah questions why she was throwing the water bottle to begin with, she responds with “I was trying to wake Timmy up, he was thirsty!”
In 4th Period English…
Jiwoo Wi (‘17): “Hippo’s are fat!”
Michael Yeakey: “You’re body shaming hippos.”
Jiwoo: “But they’re so big!”
During the power outage on Monday Brooke Weaver (‘17) pointed to the skylights confused and asked “why are those lights still on?”
In 9th period English, Joel Plank claimed “ The theme of this story is fiction.”
During study hall in the sightline room Gianella Salas (‘16) says “She only gets one or two hours of sleep.” Sophie Miller (’17) very confused asked “Is that possible? Doesn’t your heart stop!?”
During 3rd period Econ, Josh Weaver says, “Definitely Not Cannibal Coffee is a productive business. You just have to take time to grind things up”
Michael Yeakey said to the 9th period English class, “I’m gonna learn to play the bagpipes… I might have to live alone when I retire…”
During Economics period 3, Josh Weaver finishes an example with “Be a scaredy cat, believe everything you hear, and don’t get mauled by bears, live by this and you will live. Take that to College Paul”
If I was seasick, I would still eat people. -Natan Nafziger (‘17)
“Think of something that makes you happy, like your favorite food-” -Brody Thomas “Puppies!” -Jiwoo Wi (‘17)
During Economics Kyle Snyder (‘16) is reading a student made example about game theory and says out loud “But then who gets the other third of the galaxy?”
In 7th period US History, while discussing ways the US could have captured Pancho Villa, Natan Nafziger (‘17) said, “We could take Macchu Pichu’s parents hostage or someone else important to him.” Everyone, incredibly confused asked him if he meant Pancho Villa, to which he responded, “They sound the same!”
Brent Reinhardt asks 7th period US History what the word “Populist” sounds like to them. CJ Zmudzinski (‘17) responds “Puppies!”
“What doesn’t kill you makes you fatter.” -Gianella Salas (‘16)
During study hall Darienne Maust (‘16) is filling out college applications and says, “I’m going to a four year college to get my bachelorette degree.”
During AP Government Josh proudly states “I am actually for a Benevolent Monarchy.” Very excited Kyle Snyder (‘16) responds with “WOOOOOOOO!” then he pauses and says “I actually don’t know what that means.”
Carissa Woolace (‘17) calls across the Social Media/Wit room to Leah Beachey (‘17), “Leah, come sit in this chair! I want to spin you!”
“Tubusculous” “Tuberculocust” – Darienne Maust (‘16) attempting to say the word Tuberculosis.
I’m not going to say ‘student’ because that makes me sound inferior. I’m just as ferior as the rest of them!” -Ethan Lapp (‘16)
“Always remember a pump fake can impregnant a chad” – Josh Weaver
In 8th period English, Michael Yeakey told his class, “I think we should all bring in beanie babies and every time Gavin (‘18) raises his hand, we should pelt him with them.”
“Holy Jesus alto’s!” -Brody Thomas
After a Spanish review, Nina told Carissa Woolace (‘17) she did well. Elijah Lora (‘16) glances over and responds, “I had it, I just didn’t have the que, que, que.”
In English Period 4, Michael Yeakey complains about duct tape wallets being sticky and Luke Hanna (‘16) responds, “They only get sticky if they are in warm places.” Michael replies, “Are you saying I have a hot butt?” Luke responds, “Yes.”
“Hold your breath until the second coming of Jesus.” -Brody Thomas
“Now there’s this instrument that the soprano’s are going to imitate, and it may sound bad, almost like a field of ducks being steam rolled, but we’re going to try it anyway.” -Brody Thomas
“Minor injustices, like hitting a dog with a lawnmower.” -Dale Shenk. Olivia Lapadat (‘18) leans over to Hannah Kaethler (‘18) and whispers, “Minor injustice?! You sprayed dog all over my lawn!”
“Do you only put brain farts in that’s life” -Elijah Lora (‘16)
During 4th period English, Michael asked Martin Gerig (‘16) if he would pinky promise that he had come up with the answer on his own. Martin promised and just as they were going to link pinkies, Anna Barnard (‘17) loudly protested by saying, “You’re doing it wrong! You have to use the same hand to pinky promise, not opposites!”
“Every google search can end in a gun purchase” -Josh Weaver
During 8th period precalculus Renae Yoder says “Now that we have worked on some problems; let’s try something more challenging.” Gi Salas (‘16) responds with “…and I was just starting to like these problems.” While Daniel Robles (‘17) mutters under his breath “This is why we can’t have nice things.”
“Wait Halloween is in October right?” -Darienne Maust (‘16)
“My torso to leg proporico is off” -Gianella Salas (‘16) “Do you mean proportion?” -Lindsey Riddle (‘16)
Josh asks his AP Gov class “Has anyone heard of the Baath Party?” Elijah Lora (’16) comments “ I hear they have dirty politics.”
“The bosom of Abraham doesn’t mean he had breast injections” -Michael Yeakey
Lane Miller (’17) asks assistant tennis coach Seth Krabill what his favorite animal is. Seth responds with “probably the homo sapien” Lane responds with “no Seth it has to be alive, not extinct”
“Please work quietly so that other groups may work quietly. Now look at this cow made out of butter.” – Josh Weaver
Leah Beachey (’17), trying to eat a chip off the floor without touching the chip with her hands says, “I need to stop laughing so I can get my tongue out!”
“ I went to Colorado over the summer and at every public park there is an aura of weed. It was incredible.” -Josh Weaver
In period 4 English, Michael Yeakey told his students, “Many of you have probably seen Les Mis but none of you have probably read it. Darienne Maust (‘16) immediately responds, “Well you can’t hear the music if you read it.”
Ethan Lapp (‘16) observantly announced that many of the August birthdays come from the senior class. Jan Stair responded, “ I wonder what was going on in 1997. Was there a blizzard or something?”
“Drugs are everywhere! I have drugs in my coffee! Of course I mean caffeine in this case.” – Josh Weaver
“Imagine what would happen if we switched the gas and the water hoses in fire trucks!!” -Calvin Swartzendruber
“Canadians are good for two things: Hockey and Tim Horton’s.” -Brent Reinhardt
Sitting in Calculus class Alex Reinhardt (‘16) pulls down his athletic pants. Renae puzzled asks “Alex, why are your pants around your ankles?” He immediately responds with “I’m hot.”
“… I like the phrase freedom nugget.” -Josh Weaver
During period 2 English, Hannah Yeakey (‘17) asked “Was marijuana even around during the 20’s?” Michael Yeakey answers with “Yes, many jazz players smoked marijuana.” Hannah responds to this with “So that’s how they got the weird rhythms.”