So, we’ve all heard the basics. Wash your hands, don’t touch your face, stay 6 feet apart, etc…. But here at Sightline, we have the inside scoop of the best ways to get through this pandemic.
Stock. Up. Stores are running out of hand sanitizer, toilet paper, and even baby diapers! But you don’t need any of those things. The stores will fill up again with those by your next shopping trip, what you really need is mustard. Yes, you read that right. Mustard. It is proven that mustard is the best way to ward off The Virus. Replace your soap with it. Incorporate it into your diet. I’m saying shampoo with mustard! Even some have experienced amazing benefits from mustard baths! Hurry, go to your local stores, be safe, but stock up! Mustard will soon be gone and you’ll wish you’d gotten it sooner.
Next, invest. The stocks are low right now but that’s not what I’m talking about. Plane tickets are the name of the game. Buy the cheapest tickets you can find to the farthest away places you can but don’t forget travel insurance. As soon as you purchase the tickets, receive your refund for hundreds of miles to use in the future. You just paid 46 dollars for that flight to Armenia but once this is all over, you’ll have a 46 dollar flight to anywhere in the world! Do it!
Are you getting tired of going on walks with your family? Time to get creative. Take a mirror selfie, print out a life-size version of it, cut it out, measure yourself on cardboard, cut that out, paste the picture to your cardboard self, find a good stick, tape your “you” to the stick, and jam the stick in a remote control car. Bada-boom bada-bing. Sit in the isolated comfort of your home while “you” and your family are out on a walk. Just make sure you’re watching them so “you” know where to walk.
These three very simple tips will help you get through this interesting time healthily and happily. Always remember to think smarter, not harder. Good luck out there.